At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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