Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off

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(519): View more from Ontario

she's naming her girl london marie

(519): View more from Ontario

that kid will be born with a tramp stamp

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(203): View more from Connecticut

My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.

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(219): View more from Indiana

where are my pants?

(1-219): View more from Indiana

you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(708): View more from Illinois

We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.

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(315): View more from New York

Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years

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(212): View more from New York

All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it

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(850): View more from Florida

We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.

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(951): View more from California

Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying

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