Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
