whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
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