I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize