fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
