Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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