i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize