Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize