Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.