Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize