I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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