I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize