Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I see more hoeing in ur future
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
