How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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