I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I just gift wrapped bread.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Randomize