So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
