you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize