i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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