That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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