i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
