Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
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I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
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Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
My vagina is officially offended.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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