Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize