Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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