my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
