brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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