Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize