OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
North Korea, Best Korea!
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Randomize