You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
you told grandpa to call you daddy
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
