He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just want nice things and good sex
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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