I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
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