She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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