very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
