Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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