my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?