South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team