omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize