Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
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