Sry I called you an 8
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize