She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
