Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
