Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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