It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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