it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.