C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction