I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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