If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
