Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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