first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i came on her dog
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
