he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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