HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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