well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
