I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
